Monday, June 06, 2005
Pissed off
I'm not sure how to go about describing my current state of mind, but it's not good. I've been pissed off at a lot of people lately and I'm not sure if it's something wrong with me, or them, or both. Most of this has happened since moving into the new house, but I think the roots of it go further back. It's a shame that I don't understand this better. I have a couple guesses as to what's going on. First, it's some kind of hormonal thing, possibly brought on through to my newfound addiction to swimming and lifting weights, that is making me notice things now that would have previously gone undetected, or at least ignored. I'm not so sure that's it, though, since my malaise seems to be directed at specific people, not everybody I see. I guess I could have also hit some kind of tipping point where I'm just tired of ignoring all the stupid shit I have to put up with. An alternative is that I am, in fact, surrounded by people who aren't as decent as I thought. Now I'm not saying that I'm some kind of saint, nor that I'm any better than any of you. I know I can be a jerk sometimes, and I'm working on that. I'm just used to feeling like I'm surrounded by smart, honest, decent people, and now I'm getting the impression that I'm not and it's frustrating. I think this is all compounded by the fact that everybody whom I think really understands me isn't ever around, or even in the state. This isn't the first time I've felt this way, but usually it only lasts a day or so before I revert to my indifferent, coping self. This time, it keeps getting compounded by my interactions, so I'm going to actually try to do something about it. What, I'm not sure, but I'm going to need to affect major change in the way I live my life if I'm ever going to get out of this rut.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
Sorry to hear you are mad at the world currently, or rather, specific people in it. Hope I didn't make it worse by visiting.
You can be kind of oblivious, so maybe moving stuff around just put things in the forefront for you to notice them. Hell, I don't know.
Anyway, I hope the mood passes and/or you get things squared away easily and quickly.
Fuzzy, angry... It just seems wrong... I mean, anger at the government I'm used to...
* gives "the man" the finger on your behalf*
OMG Fuzzy, OMG. You really are like a woman. That's why I like you so much.
Kevin using your laptop, Me and Parker running the dryer in middle of the night, people at work and their retarded comments on star wars movies, Everyone getting all up in your personal life with no real justifications for their opinions, even though they are right goddamnit... It sure is a lot to put up with.
Sarcasm aside, I hope I am not causing any of your malaise, but if I am, I'll take a page from your book and say "fuck you, I aint changing for no body", and keep doing whatever it is that pisses you off.
Ok, that was still sarcastic. I lied about the sarcasm aside part. Im such an ass.
You should take a vacation, maybe. Go see some sites. Visit Utah. I think Utah is maybe the solution to everything. It's why the Mormons moved there.
Probably the sooner you confront these people in an honest and straightforward way, the sooner you might be able to get past being angry at them. Odds are they have no idea how they're upsetting you or why. You can't fix a problem if you don't address it.
Any group of people who think that Utah is the fucking promised land are running on fumes. I think I've figured out what I need to feel better; I'm just too much of a gentleman to say it infront of the kids.
Have you been to Utah? If not, don't judge it 'til you've tried it. It's the coolest place I've ever seen. And I've seen a lot of places.
And if you can't say "I need to be anally raped" in front of the kids, who can you say it in front of?
Post a Comment